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I’m falling apart

at the seams

it is a slow process

that sometimes

doesn’t exist because

I feel normal, complete, successful


I have a day where I want to do so much

I have planned this to do or that to enjoy

and NOTHING gets done

because I am falling


And then

I am not and I get things done that I never thought I would

And then

I fall again

because the dishes are half done

the laundry is sour

there are crafty items everywhere


I cannot even complete a conversation with a friend


I’m falling apart

loosing a grip

shaking with anticipation of the next thing that my mind tells my body to do

willing my mind to focus but so unable to complete anything

making those around me go crazy

because I am crazy


I’m falling apart



In spite of me


I think that I am the one making a difference by wearing a dress. But really,  the difference is being made in spite of me.
Bringing attention to myself by posting about myself, words or pictures, isn’t as helpful as I would like it to be.

I am not important.  It is not me that makes this work or go away.

Sure, I am a vessel for the cause.  But it all works in spite of me. In spite of my self-consciousness, my forgetfulness, my desire for attention, my fear, my inattention, and all my other faults!

Here’s what I mean: I am important.  My voice in the fight may be the only voice some hear.  AND despite all my faults a difference is being made.
Someone once told me that it must take courage to do this challenge. To wear dresses every day and have my own style.  Another person said I was a trend setter due to my eclectic pattern mixing. I heard someone ask, “What is she wearing?”
What’s interesting is that it takes more courage to move that conversation away from my fashion choices and to the real issue of slavery.  There is a special kind of courage to move the conversation away from ME & to the issue at hand.

I am working on having that courage.  Your choice to read this blog is helping me find my voice and courage.  I appreciate that you have chosen to read my blog.

IF you are able donate to the cause of freeing people form the bonds of slavery. Not only will you help free them, you will help to rehabilitate them by your gift.



I get to be in the yearbook!


A few days ago one of the students who is on the yearbook staff asked me if they could do a little feature on me and the #dressembermovement

Of course with my goal being to talk to as many people as I could about this issue I said YES! Then she said she needed me to write a little bit about it in the Humans of New York style.

So here is what I wrote:

For much of my life I have been interested in social justice.  I look outward into the world instead of being focused on myself.  A little over a year ago I heard about a little thing called Dressember.  I love a good play on words so I looked into it.

Turns out the founder of Dressember enjoys word play too.

What began, for her, as a fun little creative jaunt has become a world wide event to raise awareness and funding.  The organizations that benefit from funds that are raised during Dressember free slaves and also work very hard to rehabilitate them so they don’t fall prey to the victimization again.

I knew I needed to participate.

This is my second year wearing dresses.  No, skirts don’t work.  To quote FAQ’s from the Dressember site “it isn’t Skirtember”.  Dresses are not my comfort zone.  I feel vulnerable in dresses.  All of my dresses are summer dresses so I feel cold a lot too.  It makes me exceedingly aware of all the comfort I have around me.




It was hard to write about it without going all dark and self-righteous.  I had to really think about my audience and what I wanted them to hear about the #movement that so many people have joined.

The reality is that the more we discuss it the more we will be able to help it go away.  The more aware people become about the issues the more they can do to help heal it. We all know that though.  That doesn’t mean we should stop talking about it.  If fact it means that we should keep talking and keep talking.

Please donate to the Isaiah 61:1-3 team effort.

This little light of mine


I’m gonna let it shine in the form of a dress.

It is shining in the darkness of slavery.  It is a beacon of hope for the hopeless.

Today at lunch a co-worker came to lunch and I was able to share my reason for wearing a dress was more than just my quirky style.

Unfortunately, it isn’t what people want to hear.  They don’t want to think about how they need to spend a little more on things and have less in order to make sure that others aren’t taken advantage of.  When we are looking at the spending season (aka the hap-happiest season of all) and needing to have loads of presents under the tree.  The light still MUST shine.

I am happily finding places to shop and telling people about them.  I am happily shining my light daily.

If you follow my instagram you have seen a two constant posts for the past 4 days and you’ll continue to see them.  Our family tradition of ornaments and my dressember campaign. (If you don’t you should imacurlygirl)

The ornaments are little lights in the darkness of the winter.  My dresses are little lights that spark discussions.

Check out my Dressember Team site for donation options. Whether its’s $5.00 or $50.00 any amount helps!


I officially have a TEAM!


I am so excited that Kezia joined the team I made on the Dressember Isaiah 61:1-3.

A team is support.  It is fellowship and friendship. A team works together to accomplish a goal.  A team is “together we can do more”. A team says we support each other.

About a week or so ago Kezia posted on my facebook that she was going to join me.  I asked if she wanted to do a team and she agreed. About 12 hours ago she officially joined (reminder: it is never to late to join the team… come on, let’s make a difference together!) the Isaiah 61:1-3 team.

When I was thinking about a team name the verse “oil of joy instead of mourning” came to me. I thought what could that verse be talking about.  I looked it up and here is what the verses around it say:

The Spirit of the Sovereign Lord is on me,
    because the Lord has anointed me
    to proclaim good news to the poor.
He has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted,
    to proclaim freedom for the captives
    and release from darkness for the prisoners,[a]
to proclaim the year of the Lord’s favor
    and the day of vengeance of our God,
to comfort all who mourn,
    and provide for those who grieve in Zion—
to bestow on them a crown of beauty
    instead of ashes,
the oil of joy
    instead of mourning,
and a garment of praise
    instead of a spirit of despair.
They will be called oaks of righteousness,
    a planting of the Lord
    for the display of his splendor.

I love the context surrounding the “oil of joy for mourning” verse.  I love that in verse one it talks about being sent “to proclaim freedom for the prisoners” and that in verse three it talks about those who are in despair will be “oaks of righteousness”.  In general, when I read these verses I was amazed and so happy that that was what the verse was about.  Immediately I began to think how I could use it in my campaign.

Everyday I put on a dress is a meditation.  A strong thought that is deliberate and purposeful. I am meditating about how I get to choose the dress and others do not have the ability to choose anything.

I will talk more about the meditation on Wednesday week.

I want you to spend some time this week meditating on the verses posted and imagine the freed and reintegrated slaves who are benefiting from all the hard work organizations like IJM, A21, Polaris, and so many other anti-slavery organizations do.

If your are able it would also help if you donated to our team.

Round two!


I am back.  A second year of dress wearing.  I haven’t bought a new dress since last year so the pictures you see on my instagram (imacurlygirl) will feel very familiar!

Serendipitously, I was off today.  I had a dentist appointment (honestly, I totally forgot when I scheduled it in June) so I was able to go out in the world and talk about Dressember on my first day.

I love my dentist! She is fantastic! ~I don’t get paid 😉

The hygienist asked what was going on and I opened with “well it’s #givingtuesday and the start of dressember”.  So that of course opened the conversation and the idea for today’s blog.

We talked about how I am a serious pattern mixer especially since all of my dresses are summer (short or sleeveless). We talked about the supply chain.  The conversation took us to trafficking out of a local spa.  It is always good to talk with people who are genuinely interested and who will begin to think about their consumerism in a different way after our conversation.

One thing I want to do differently this year is talk.  Talk to everyone I meet about my adventure.  My meditation. This journey toward awareness.

I would love it if you could help out in any way you can.  Tell people, give to an anti-slavery organization, become aware of your consumerism.

Keep posted all month long.  Check my blog daily for my new post.  Follow me on my instagram.  Watch my facebook posts.

Here is my donation site for Dressember

Hugs. For Life.


This is my cousin’s blog! #ihavedecided #jonacuffmethod

Jenn Hudson


Let’s talk hugs.

I visited a church one weekend with my husband, and met this beautiful gal who greeted me at the door with the sweetest smiling face. Her skin was the color of Africa, and that may be why I liked her all the more, but her smile and warmth could be felt as equally as far away as her country of origin. “Thank you,” were the only two words I spoke to her as she gave me that rich warm greeting and held my door open. I turned back and added, “You are so pretty!” Which is about the only thing I know to say when my heart is feeling full, and I want to tell someone that I appreciate them more than this fleeting moment. She stopped and did something entirely unexpected from this rich-smile-warm-heart door greeting lady, she hugged me. She pulled me in and gave me a precious…

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surrounded by love



This picture is precious to me. This little girl is the apple of her daddy’s eye (& everyone else’s). She is happy and eager. She is also sweet and innocent. I love talking to her and hearing her tell stories. Her hugs are like kisses from heaven. She is gentle and honest.
She is a gem and to be treasured, just like EVERY girl (& child for that matter) on the planet.
Unfortunately there are people on this planet who do not feel that way.
They feel children have no place other that to serve in some way.
This whole month I have spent time thinking & writing about slavery and the people who are embroiled in it in some way shape or form.
There are people who sell their children so that they can feed their other children and themselves. There are children who choose to be sold so they can “provide” for their families.
These children shouldn’t have to feel the need to “provide”. They shouldn’t be the commodity that is traded for other commodities. They should be cherished, loved, & made to feel safe. To do otherwise is a travesty.
Why isn’t more done about this problem? I dont have an answer or a fancy quip. I wish I did.
What I do know is that every child I come in contact from now on will feel cherished in some way. They will feel like they are important. I will work to build them up. That is my way of providing for them in the hopes that they feel important to one person (at least) on this planet.
That is the least I can do right now. What can you do?

into the light


Darkening blinds leave out all light. There is comfort in that darkness sometimes.  A cuddle under the blankets. A warmth. A silky smoothness. A never want to get up ness. A stay in the jammies. A keep your eyes closed. A lethargy.  If you choose to get up in that darkness perhaps a stumble.
But what if you forgot to close those blinds all the way?
What happens when it is time to get up?
That little sliver of light that shines in the darkness.
A prevention of a stumble?
A desire to get up?
An energy?
It is hard to keep your eyes closed when there is light (even a little) streaming into an otherwise dark room.
There is an allegory called The Cave. It is about a person in a dark cave who is dragged against his will into the light….. at first the person is angry and in pain but as he adjusts to seeing the new reality returns to tell the others in the cave about the outside. However, he is unable to see now that he is back in darkness again. The people who greet him think that he is damaged due to his experience outside. They do not want the damaging experience of going outside.
Now, I made some minor modifications in this alegory but it works. Once people find out about human trafficking they cannot go back to ignorance. Most want to figure out how to make a difference. However some really do not want to know. Ignorance is bliss after all right?
I am not going back to the dark cave except to tell others.




I have been out of the blogersphere for a few days. Recouperating my brain and my soul. I didn’t even take pictures for a few of those days. It has been a wonderful respite.
But now I am back BUT please forgive me as I am blogging from my phone due to some technological difficulties.
So here it is…. I have love. So much love in my life. I am remembered, cherished, & cared for.
When I am out of touch with the people who care about me they notice. I am not easily forgotten.
When I return I am greeted with joy. I am hugged, held, & reminded that I am important.
Now, take a moment think about recent news items. The children who have been kidnapped from school in massive numbers AND never found! Now, those who care about these children have not forgotten about their children, but the rest of the world has.
Maybe because we have so much happening that we can’t be bothered with the grief of others or maybe it is just because the media jumps from one thing to the next. Who knows but their plight isn’t on the top of our priorities. Sad.
On my journey this month I am realizing the short attention span we have in our culture. The fact that there are 27.9 million slaves may not be on anyone’s radar in January. Sad.
That is where I am today.
Till tomorrow.